Where A sense of Security Really Comes From
What provides the most security in life?
Ultimately, not money in the stock market or money from our day jobs. Not government. Not even our own physical health, sometimes. (Our current circumstances show these things are unreliable.)
So what does provide ultimate security?
Simply put, a loving relationship. Having someone in your life you can totally rely on for support. Even if --especially if--that person is your OWN SELF.
I see this so clearly in my clients. The work they do with me creates the biggest sense of security they’ve ever had. Because, yes, it makes their marriages so much more stable, loving, tender, peaceful, and strong. (And often means two incomes coming into their home.)
But even more so, because --possibly for the first time ever-- they begin to feel super confident in themselves. They start to rely on and trust themselves in a bigger way than they’ve known was possible.
And do you know what happens when you can trust yourself to be there for yourself no matter what?
What do YOU think it would do for you? Pause and think about it...
The whole world opens up for you. The things you want stop feeling ever-elusive or impossible.
You stop self-limiting like you’ve done up till now.
You stop thinking you don’t have what it takes to support yourself, or pursue your talents, or have the deep close friendships you’ve longed for.
You stop feeling helpless. Courage and power well up where once there was only fear and hesitation.
You start actually creating what you WANT in your life.
Coming up with the money to invest in a certain dream of yours? Getting that job you’ve always wanted? Making an income way beyond what you thought you could? You won’t tell yourself it’s not possible anymore. You’ll just do what it takes to make it happen.
Putting paint brush to paper, writing that imagined book, letting out the creative soul in you that yearns for expression? You’ll find the courage you’ve never had before to let it flow out of you.
When you trust yourself to have your own back like this, it doesn’t mean life isn’t painful sometimes. But you’ll no longer be afraid you can’t handle these hard parts of life that simply come along with being human. You won’t feel upended by them.
You’ll start facing setbacks and disappointments like they are just tiny waves on a giant ocean...no biggie. You’ll find solutions to whatever problems arise so much easier.
When you get your relationship right with your own mind and heart in this way, you’ll become a person who is no longer afraid of being fully herself. Who FEELS her own worth.
So you’ll finally be able to feel how deeply you matter to your partner. Like you’re a loving team together.
Or... you’ll be able to see clearly that this relationship is no longer one you want to be in--or that your partner just can’t truly love you --and choose to free yourself from it without regret. With more peace and ease than you thought possible. (And you won’t beat yourself up for not having done it sooner!)
For me, one of the biggest benefits of building this kind of trusting loving relationship with myself is it’s taken the pressure off my relationship to provide my happiness for me.
When you have that, too, it’ll free you up to enjoy your partner so much more. He becomes like the icing on the cake of your life.
If you want that, start with caring for yourself enough to choose to do the work that gets you to that place of deep trust in your own self.
This kind of security goes well beyond the safety and solace you find in money, or even in your marriage (though that’s great, too!). It’s security that comes from within and is ever-renewable, no matter what.
The deeply loving trusting secure relationship you want with your partner comes naturally from there... Everything you want comes from there.
If you like the sound of that, but don’t know how to go about getting there, I will show you exactly how when you come coach with me.
Come join the ranks of other sensitive women who, through our work together, have blown their own minds by how secure they now feel in themselves and in their marriages. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org with an “I’m in” and we’ll choose a time to talk about how you can do the same.