Your Love Life: The Place Your Feathers Get Ruffled
Updated: Jun 13, 2020
If you are like many of the sensitive folks I know, for the most part you have your life pretty “together”.
You have work that you feel decently capable of, whether that’s a career or parenting or both.
You have it pretty figured out when it comes to eating healthy enough, keeping your home as you like it, maybe having activities or hobbies you enjoy.
You may even have some good solid friendships (though you might still feel lonely or not up to par fully here).
For the most part these areas of your life feel pretty much under control. You don’t find yourself upset too often about things in these parts of your life--though you have your moments! You might not notice your sensitivity “come out” too much in these areas.
And then.. there’s your relationship!
That is where your feathers get ruffled. Your stuff gets stirred up... And you become easily prickly, easily hurt, quick to close down or lash out. This is where you feel you fall apart. Where sensitivity feels like hyper-touchiness. Where you can’t maintain the facade that you have it all together.
This is because relationships are the great revealers. Anyway that we are not integrated as a human will show up smack dab in our committed relationship.
If this is going on for you, think of it as good news. Because your relationship is the last link..the place where, once you master yourself there, you will not only feel so good in your marriage, but you will amp up your enjoyment of all the other areas of your life.
This is exactly how it all happened for me. I first had to admit to myself that the arena of intimate relationships was my weak area and I had some real work to do to be truly happy in my relationship.
Once I stepped up and started doing the work to become a Highly Integrated HSP--which is pivotal to having a thriving marriage-- it translated into all the other areas of my life, making them ALL so much better.
I am not alone in this. My clients report major improvements in all areas of their lives as they do this work on themselves and their relationship:
Friendships sweeter, health better. At work they are more effective and lighthearted, focused, and satisfied. At home with the kids, too. Or with other family members with whom things have been hard. Dreams set aside come back to life. Start taking shape in the real world. Across the board, their life feels-- finally-- light, fun, meaningful, rich... Right.
If your love life is the place you feel out of whack, overly sensitive, frustrated and confused, then you know where you need to start to move from being a normal highly sensitive person to being a Highly Integrated Highly Sensitive person (HI-HSP). Someone who not only gets by in all areas of her life, but thrives in them ALL.
Developing yourself into this highly integrated version of you will make your marriage the most exceptional one it can be, and carry over into all the other aspects of your life --making them so much better than they have been.
Because you have become the kind of person who knows how to live a life she loves. Thanks to the work you did in your marriage on YOU.
P.S. If you know your intimate relationship is a weak link in your overall life happiness, and you are ready to put in some effort to create the love that you want, the security that you want, the sense of feeling loved you want-- come coach with me.
Together we will catapult you into a whole new level not just in your love life, but in all the other areas of your life. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and write "Let's talk", and we'll set up a time to chat about what you're going through, what you want, and whether coaching with me is the right thing to get you there.