This is where we got married. I walk by here regularly, in all seasons, in all moods.
Some days I look at this spot and my heart swells with joy and the feeling of being the luckiest girl in the world. Other times I look at it — and I don’t feel much at all. Other times still, I look at it and feel kind of bummed, kind of frustrated.
Like what I’m feeling now isn’t what I expected that glorious wedding day when we had the biggest smiles plastered to our faces and the wildest sense of love and potential and joy — like, darn, what we felt then didn’t stick. But then the next time I walk by, I connect right back into that expansive, brimming-over, heart-exploding-with-love-and-connection-to-my-man-feeling. That’s what’s funny about us humans. Feelings fluctuate with where our mind goes. Feelings ride on the back of where our attention is going. And some days more than others our brains more easily go to starker places. And you know what? I no longer make that mean that something’s wrong with my marriage. I never make it mean that I don’t have an amazing marriage. I make it mean that I have feelings that come and go depending where my mind goes. Which means that sometimes I will purposefully steer my mind as I walk by that beautiful spot to our wild love and our wild joy that we find in being together! But other times, I just let my mind do what my mind naturally does that day...knowing moods and thoughts can come and go. But they actually have nothing to do with how deep our love is, how true our love is, how strong our marriage is! You can do the same. You can feel the normal, full spectrum of human feelings, and still have an unwavering trust in the strength and security of your marriage — and never doubt the love it is built on. When you live THERE, guess what? Any of those harder emotional moments pass by quickly, with no getting stuck there for hours or days…and access to lightness, laughter, and playfulness between you and your honey is easy and much more frequent. If you know you could use support to make your marriage amazing, come coach with me. Head here to schedule your consult.